The New York Times just recently put out an article on equal parenting in the piece called “When Mom and Dad Share It All”. The title about covers the concept of the topic.  Not much of a question here about what’s to be expected.

As a father myself, I love the idea of fathers bringing in more of the work effort on household chores.  Whether it be laundry or child rearing, I believe Dad needs to help.  I believe it’s a waste to not have a father interact with his most valuable asset:  his family.  I also believe that Mom shouldn’t be tied up at home.  To lock her down with 50% of our society is a complete waste of resources.  And I don’t mean to imply that she is a resource for corporate greed, I’m saying that she is needed to help grow a positive society, a social world with a proper balance.

The article by the Times goes into describing a few different families, including same sex parenting.  They focus things down to social influence as being the driving factor on who carries what loading.  There is also a mention of “monkey see, monkey do” in the natural tendencies of the parents that they picked up from their parents, which is not surprising since that is often the source of education in parenting that many people are limited to.

Even though I like the concept of both parents being involved in equal parenting, I did have a few problems with the article.  This may be a shock to the blogosphere where this is the hot rage right now, but there are a few issues not addressed by this article.

First, why doesn’t the piece talk about natural tendencies based on the sexes?  One could start thinking that both parents are equally versed in all skills, when in reality we are hardwired differently by mother nature.  Millions of years of evolution doesn’t exactly change immediately with a few years of new social perspective.

Second, look at the numbers in the article.   The average heterosexual couple claims they pull 45 hours of housework, but a more equally parented family in a same sex household puts in at most 20 hours per week.  Sounds like some exaggeration is going on somewhere!  Why did they drop such an obvious discrepancy?  Maybe the social pressure is to great for the researchers to not act like the marketing department putting down Dads as the trend currently stands.

<<Before>>   << After>>

It’s like a tale of two cities.  One photo is dark and gloomy;  the other is bright and warm.  Thanks to Adobe Lightroom 1.4, Daddy can recover photos from earlier camera work.  In this case, we took the picture with our old Casio Exilim.  Actually, its not old as far as cameras go.  The Casio Exilim was only about 3 years old.  We had bought it just before Christmas at RadioShack.  Now its a feeble piece of equipment compared to our Nikon D200.

To clean up the photo, Daddy first imported the photo into Adobe Lightroom 1.4 on our desktop computer.  Using the import function, we imported all of the photos on the C drive. To our surprise, we initially loaded up 4500+ pictures into the library.  Amazing!

Next, the photo was selected from Lightroom’s All Photos library.  Clicking on the Develope module, we made multiple adjustments.   The first was to raise the exposure +0.67 of a stop to lighten things up.  The effect initially white washes everything to some extent. If nothing else, it helps Johnny’s skin from looking so ashen. 

To compensate for pushing up the exposure, the recovery setting was moved up 7 points.  Adjusting recovery under the develope settings keeps things from looking like a camera’s flash didn’t flood things out. 

Finally, the blacks were also raised up another 7 points.  Esentially it gave more contrast to the picture.  A simple trick that doesn’t require all of the crazy Adobe Photoshop learning curve to master, which is one of the main reasons of having Adobe Lightroom 1.4, and here is the proof!

 

  Please forgive the slight out of focus appearance of this picture.  It’s actually the first photo of Johnny from when he was first born.  I found it tonight as I was browsing through our family photographs.  Oh, how time flies!

Earlier today I recieved a message on my phone at work.  Jade had called to say something special had happened and she wanted to share it with me.  Luckily I’ll never go to sea again, so I get the pleasure of messages like these.

After getting a break at coordinating production with FDA compliance, I finally was able to call my wife.  She told me a quick story about what happened when they went to the gym.  From what Mommy said, Johnny had spent about an hour in the child care center at Big Vanilla Arnold while she was working out.  At some point, a little girl was crying in front of Johnny.  One of the care providers saw Johnny give the little girl a hug to make her feel better.

Its amazing that a 20 month old boy knows to give such compassion.  Mommy & I were quite proud to hear this news.

---

Later on in the day, Johnny met up with Daddy at the end of his day of work.  Mommy had brought him over to Kent Island. 

The whole family went into Terrapin State Park.  We made way to the beach with Johnny pushing his own stroller along the way.  Johnny didn’t like it much when Daddy would help steer.

At the beach we found another family already there.  Mark and Jessica had brought thier children William (3 years old) and Julliete (14 months old). The children were so cute as they played naked in the surf and sand.  They shared sandwhiches with us from the Kent Island Deli.  We talked and found out that Jessica is a lawyer in Baltimore while Mark is one of the athletic coaches at the Naval Academy in Annapolis, MD.   They were certainly another nice family who live on Kent Island.

It only took a few minutes of playing in the sand before Johnny was following William into the water. When Johnny soaked his diaper with brackish water, we decided it was time to let him play in the buff too.  It became quite the show with 3 little children running around naked on the beach.

Daddy eventually joined Johnny in the water too.  Johnny loves it when Daddy helps him body surf in shallow water.  Daddy picks him up with Johnny’s hands and drags him quickly through the water. Its a very effective way to bring Daddy to exhaustion, but its so much fun for the little guy!

The picture here with the article was of Johnny walking down the boardwalk at sunset.  It was taken May 02, 2008, at Terrapin State Park on Kent Island.  One day we hope to catch Johnny in photos with the kite surfers   Unfortunately today we didn’t have the surfers or a camera with us as we visited the beach with the wonderful view of the Chesapeake Bay Bridge.

Today as Johnny as laying on Mommy’s lap, he signed his first sentence to Daddy.  Oh, the Joy!  He signed, “Drink, please.”

Such grace. Such beauty.  Such overwhelming pride for his Daddy!

Now, there’s a good chance that he’s done this with Mommy first. He spends so much time with her, and its ok.  At least Daddy can say he will see his son almost every day, unlike being out to see on a submarine, or something else evil.

Well, its official.  American Airlines has found a great way to ensure parents like us will avoid them whenever possible. It seems lately that airlines care less and less for those who need assistance.  Parents of children certainly fall into this category when flying.

It’s irritating enough having to rush a family into a set of seats with the onrush of passengers clamering behind you.  The younger the child, the more difficult this can be.  Toddlers don’t understand that an airplane is not a new play area and that they need to sit on Mommy & Daddy’s laps. 

Now the new craze is to upcharge us for baggage.  Not a big deal if you are a single person flying off for work, but parents have a completely different game.  We have to travel with bags for Mommy, Daddy, baby, the car seat, the pack ‘n play, and Lord knows what else if you will be away from home for an extended time.  On a normal flight, 6 bags/items to check or carry is not unusual.

So, here’s the new game from American Airlines.  $15 for the first bag and $25 for each additional bag to be checked in for a flight.  But that’s not all, those prices are for just one way!  Now you get to pay $160 for 4 bags on a round trip.  Isn’t it nice that they don’t want to cater to us anymore?  On-on to other airlines!

Today as I was sitting at my computer, a friend of mine sent me the following FDA safety announcement. As you can see below, its understandable that it took a miracle to not make me spray my soda all over the computer monitor as I was drinking through the first couple of lines. On a serious note, I guess I better show this to Mommy since she’s still breast feeding Johnny.

---

FYI- no more nipple cream for you, Big Boy.

From: U.S. Food & Drug Administration (FDA) [mailto:fda@service.govdelivery.com]

Subject: FDA MedWatch- Mommy’s Bliss Nipple Cream: Product Contains Potentially Harmful Ingredients That May Cause Respiratory Distress Or Vomiting And Diarrhea In Infants

FDA informed consumers not to use or purchase Mommy’s Bliss Nipple Cream, marketed by MOM Enterprises, Inc., because the product contains potentially harmful ingredients that may cause respiratory distress or vomiting and diarrhea in infants. The product is promoted to nursing mothers to help soothe and heal dry or cracked nipples. Potentially harmful ingredients in the product are chlorphenesin and phenoxyethanol. Chlorphenesin relaxes skeletal muscle and can depress the central nervous system and cause slow or shallow breathing in infants. Phenoxyenthanol, a preservative that is primarily used in cosmetics and medications, can also depress the central nervous system and may cause vomiting and diarrhea, which can lead to dehydration in infants. Mothers and caregivers should seek immediate medical attention if their child shows signs and symptoms of a decrease in appetite, difficulty in awakening, limpness of extremities or a decrease in an infant’s strength of grip and a change in skin color.

Read the entire 2008 MedWatch Safety Summary, including a link to the FDA News Release regarding this issue at:

http://www.fda.gov/medwatch/safety/2008/safety08.htm#Bliss

The Our Father Prayer For Myspace

 

Recently I found out that there is a need for a graphic to be added to people’s profiles on Myspace.  Since it is no hidden fact that this blog is all about fatherly topics, I felt obligated to create one for the masses.  

So, feel free to right click and save the image for your own personal use.  Feel free to pass it around since I am going to leave this image here in the posting to the public domain.

 

 

Top 100 Baby Boy Names

 

Of the top 100 baby boy names, here is a snap shot at the first 20.  As a father with a son named John, I’m amazed at how unusual it is to now see it’s not in the top 20 listed below.  Amazing how things change!  It makes me wonder, how long will it take for a biblical name like my son’s to come back around?  Only time will tell.

1. Jose
2. Jacob
3. Daniel
4. Anthony
5. Christopher
6. Ethan
7. Angel
8. Joshua
9. David
10. Michael
11. Diego
12. Christian
13. Jonathan
14. Matthew
15. Andrew
16. Luis
17. Jayden
18. Noah
19. Juan
20. William

 

Not long ago, Johnny was just 4 months old. These pictures are a little over a year and 3 months old.  Unfortunately, these pictures are about as far as my memory goes.  Thank God for such fine detail. 

Johnny also has a few aunts that are much older.  As his father, I was first broken in with those lovely ladies.  Aunts Lucy and Rosy are now doctors.  To think I can still remember changing their diapers. 

 

If there is one thing I love, it’s taking pictures of Johnny.  Often we take our baby pictures with a point and shoot, but we also move up in the world when we want quality photos.  For our best in house baby pictures, we like to use our Nikon D200.

We chose the Nikon D200 for a few good reasons.  First, it has a hardened casing which is water proof and makes it hard to break if you drop it on the floor.  It’s a great safety feature since accidents happen, such as baby pulls it down for play time.

Another wonderful reason the Nikon D200 is such a great toy, is because it is reverse compatible with our lenses from an older camera.  It saved hundreds of dollars not having to upgrade like many of our Cannon friends suffered through in the implementation of the digital camera.

Being that the camera is digital, we also have the added benefit of the camera having a top of the line color histogram.  The computer inside the camera breaks down the photo into the primary colors.  The color splits allow for us to see if we have a good or bad picture without having to load it up into Adobe Photoshop.  Granted, this doesn’t prevent you from messing up the white balance or focus.

The last reason was because the camera works with the top of the line flashes from Nikon.  As you might guess, we have the SB-800 flash.  It’s not only a handy too for fill light, but it’s a great toy to surprise the baby.  Don’t worry, we don’t flash it in his face.

 

Last night a new wonder touched my heart. Johnny was reading the ” Moo, Bah, La, La, La” book by Sondra Boynton. Johnny was making all kinds of animal sounds and he followed up with saying “Moo” after the cow. How cute! When the pigs say “La, La, La”, he’ll say it a few times too. Sometimes he even says it 3 times in a row!

 

As I work in the medical world, I’m find more and more of a yearning to become a better writter.  I expect the following from my son one day down the road.

Everybody understands that I’m a stickler for good spelling. So when a fellow worker e-mailed technical documents asking me to “decifer” them, I had to correct the young man.

“Decipher is spelled with a ph, and not an f”, I wrote in my reply.  “In case you have forgotten, spell check comes free with your Microsoft Word program.”

A minute later he followed with his reply: “Must be dephective.”

To my friends at the Upstate Model Railroaders,

So, I have litterally 1/3 of the house space that I used to have up in NY.  Having a full layout is out of the question for me.  Granted I have a large N-Trak group in my area, I find that I miss the social aspect of the club.  I really do miss my “home” layout up in Glens Falls, NY.

While we’ve been here I’ve tried to contact the Severna Park club, which is one of the top layouts in the country apparently.  Sadly, I don’t think they care to invite new people to the group.  They’ve been covered in the Model Railroading magazine a couple of times in the past (take a look).  Too bad I don’t think I’ll see it until thier open house in December.

Another amazing layout we found was at a local mall.  A couple of churches convinced the Marly Station Mall to give them a good sized room by one of the entrances all year round.  Starting 6 months before Christmas, the churches of many different denominations get together and start building a brand new layout from scratch!  The substructure might be the same, but the rest is all brand new each season.  Essentially, they had 5 layouts this past season.  2 smaller units and one extra large piece with multiple levels and automated equipment that kids cycled on and off from the sidelines.  Everything they ran was O-scale.

We have made our way to DC a couple of times.  I prefer to park at the very edge of the city and take the rails in to town.  Coal trains often go running by as you travers above ground during the first part of the run.  You also get to see the maintenance yards along the way on the east side of the orange line.

Lastly, we’ve also made it up to the B&O Museum up in Baltimore.  Too bad the place is surrounded by so many bad neighborhoods.  But in the facility, things are wonderful.  Whether its steam or diesel, they have your flavor of history.  It includes a short, but historically rich train ride in the local neighborhood.  When we visited, we were lucky enough to see a small G scale layout, a huge N-scale layout, and another layout of 2 separate track plans for a massive O-scale group:  all of which were modular.  Did I forget to mention the outdoor G-scale layout?  Wow!

Hope everyone is doing well!

Daddy (Mommy, & Johnny too)

Today Johnny woke up at about 6am.  Mommy eventually picked him up out of his crib, let him play, and started him on a banana & Cheerios  breakfast.  After  a nice memory recall on  Mommy’s  part,  we all decided to go to Einstein’s Bagels in  Severna Park, MD.

We arrived and found the restaurant to be quite busy.   We all had a nice carb heavy breakfast.  Johnny was more than happy to work over his Dutch Apple Bagel.  We all agreed that it was a superior bagel house compared to Panera.

Next we  went to Annapolis Mall.  We played at the children’s area, took a potty break, and got back to more play time in a chaotic frenzy of small children climbing over animals, boats, and slides.  We finally left after Johnny tried 1 to many times to escape.  He may be quick, but not quick enough to escape Daddy:  yet!

Mommy needed to do some shopping so we went through J.C. Penny’s, Macy’s, and then finally NY & Company.  She needed a new outfit for a baby shower later in the day at 2 pm over at Kristin’s house.  Mommy picked up a real nice yellow shirt and highwaters.

During this time, Johnny hung out in the stroller patiently (for the most part) while Daddy took him through the stores, got him lunch at Subway (Juice Box, Ham and Wheat Bread only sandwhich, and raisins), and visited Border’s where Daddy bought a book and read a few for Johnny to enjoy.

When Mommy was finally done, Johnny went to sleep.  He stayed awake until 12:45pm!  Wow!  He was truly ready for a nap.  Daddy got him to pass out by giving him a binky.

When the family arrived at home, Mommy put Johnny in his crib and she then prepared herself for the shower.  Daddy unpacked all of the goods and laid down for a short nap.  Most of the nap time Daddy ended up watching a couple of episodes of Penn & Teller’s B.S. on Showtime.

Right after Mommy left, Johnny woke up.  With a few cries, Daddy picked him up and out of the crib.  He let Johnny run around until his saffron rice and chicken nuggets were ready, which didn’t take long since Daddy had a funny feeling Johnny would wake up soon so he started early on the food.

After Johnny was done eating, Daddy let Johnny watch an episode of Baby Einstein’s “Baby Neptune”.  Johnny loves the show;  Daddy loves it because he did some house cleaning and dishes.  It is also good as a distractor while Daddy put shoes, socks, and a coat on his little man.

After the video was over, Daddy & Johnny went to the playground behind Beekman Elementary School.  There Johnny went down the slide twice.  He then spent the rest of his time climbing up and down steps on the playground equipment.  He even tossed the a purple rubber ball back and forth with Daddy a couple of times.

Eventually, Mommy called and told Daddy that she was back home from the baby shower.  Daddy asked her to pick them up in front of the school.  When she arrived, Johnny was on his 4th attempt going over an embankment to walk out into traffic where all of the exciting cars were driving by at very fast speeds.  Funny boy!

Next, we convinced Mommy to go to Petsmart to get cat food for our kitties Chloe & Chester.  We also visited the fishies.  Once again Johnny was on the run again through out the store as much as he could get away with in front of Mommy & Daddy.

Finally, we came home and played some more.  We finished off with pasta for Johnny’s dinner.  We all helped Johnny take a bath where Johnny was video taped laughing as Daddy teased him with a toy.

To end the day, Daddy did the “Barnyard Dance” for Johnny.  Johnny was happy.